Everything happens in Divine perfect time. In all of the years in which I have been a student of personal development, I have read those words a million times. When the time is right, you will find the perfect job. When the time is right, you will find the perfect mate. When the time is right, everything will work out for your best and highest good. I have always been a late bloomer. I was twenty years old when I found the perfect flute teacher. I was a twenty-one-year-old graduate student when I found the perfect university to hone my skills as a musician. Although I was twenty-three when I earned my master’s degree, it took me ten years to find my perfect job that became so much a part of my identity that I didn’t know exactly where it ended and I began. I was forty-four when I published my first book and then finally met my soul mate and was forty-six when we got married on 15 July 2017. I am a late bloomer who arrives early to every appointment I have ever scheduled – oftentimes as much as thirty minutes ahead of time.
I have been developing my sense of time and timing ever since I was a young child who studied the keyboard when I was seven and the flute when I was eleven. Music students are taught to count simple rhythms from the first applied lesson with a master teacher. I remember how much I frustrated my piano teacher every time I played incorrect rhythms or couldn’t feel a sense of the overall pulse of the composition. Most of my problems occurred because of my horrendous finger technique. I hated to practice and preferred to fly by the seat of my pants. It took me several years to fully appreciate the satisfaction attained by achieving perfection. That perfection only lasted for a minute and left me perpetually striving for a taste of those magical moments when time stands still for a little while each day. I first encountered those moments as a graduate student at the University of the Arts. I was not the typical college student, especially as an undergraduate. I didn’t go to college to socialize. I went to develop my skills as a musician and ended up spending four years searching for a competent flute teacher. I suppose I became a loner who was completely absorbed in achievement. I met the man who would become my mentor in the fall of my senior year of undergraduate school and was finally put on a lifelong learning path where I discovered the one thing that had been elusive in my four-year-college undergraduate experience – progress. As my skills improved, my heart opened up, and I was able to attempt to sculpt music from the air. The magic was ignited, time was temporarily suspended and, in the words of Ram Dass, I was able to “be here now” on the stage of Laurie Wagman Hall at the University of the Arts.
Once I completed my graduate degree, I had a difficult time finding my niche in the professional world. To ease my anxiety, I began studying philosophical concepts, which resulted in me contemplating the nature of time and timing once again. Wayne Dyer oftentimes spoke about the bliss of the present moment, and upon devouring several of his books, I began to contemplate my experiences on stage in the concert hall where I literally had no sense of time. The more information I read and the more I remembered my moments of musical magic, the more I was convinced that linear time and eternity overlapped. St. Augustine believed the “present occupied no space.” Memories keep the past alive in the present moment, and future events can be imagined in the mind’s eye, so the “now” is where past, present and future meet. I thoroughly discuss my theories about the nature of time in chapter one of Mirror of the Soul. I contemplate scientific law, philosophy and then provide musical and artistic examples to support my claims.
The following excerpt is from chapter one of my book:
Before the Big Bang, the universe existed in a state of timelessness or what the ancient Greeks referred to as kairos. Kairos is eternity or God’s time. With the commencement of the Big Bang, linear time was born. Essentially, sound created linear time or chronos. . This coincides with John’s account in the New Testament: “In the beginning the Word was…” (John 1:1 OEB). God’s word, or, the sound of his voice, created the universe. Scientists call the beginning of the universe Alpha. Since the Big Bang, the universe has been accelerating towards absolute zero, which scientists refer to as Omega. In Revelation 1:8 we learn, “‘I am the Alpha and the Omega,’ says the Lord, the God who is, and who was, and who will be, the Almighty” (OEB)… Science refers to linear time, which began at the Big Bang (Alpha) and is accelerating to absolute zero (Omega), as real time. However, according to Stephen Hawking, “quantum theory introduces a new idea, that of ‘imaginary time.’” Imaginary time is literally “one enormous moment of now.” It sounds a lot like the kairos of the ancient Greeks or God’s time. As chronos is contained in kairos, so, too, is real time contained in imaginary time. Whereas real time is horizontal, imaginary time is vertical and occurs at right angles to real time…Giorbran states,“The universe knows where it is going from the very first moment of time… Near the end of time, a balance between time and anti-time can ensure all such planning and coordination is the long arm of the future reaching into the past” (p. 189–190). In order for the force of Omega to be stronger than the force of gravity that pulls the universe back into the past, the future would have to be complete already. The Creator allows for free will, and science tells us that there are many roads that lead to the final destination. In order for everything to be so meticulously planned, allowing for a plethora of possibilities, there would have to be an all-knowing being in charge.
In the remaining paragraphs of chapter one, I discuss creators whose works I believe reflect the manner in which time overlaps. I analyze Jim Henson’s Time Piece, Messiaen’s Quartet for the End of Time, Michelangelo’s Sistine Chapel and sculptures and Beethoven’s symphonies. I conclude the chapter with an excerpt from William Blake’s Auguries of Innocence:
To see the world in a grain of sand
And a heaven in a wild flower,
Hold infinity in the palm of your hand
And eternity in an hour.
Because I believed “infinity can be held in the palm of your hand” in one big moment of “now,” I intended to provide an accompanying CD as mentioned in my book many times. The cost of the project, however, was prohibitive for me at the time. I thoroughly analyze the music I chose in my text, and this accompanying CD was going to include past performances and new performances. The past performances represented moments where I was completely “in the zone,” so I had the recordings re-mastered. Until now, I didn’t have the chance to record new music, but the pandemic changed everything for me and suddenly left me with enough time and ingenuity to record all of my beloved pieces. In terms of minutes, half of the selections would be from the past and half would be current performances – with the premise that this music is timeless and time overlaps in the now.
The past recordings can be heard on my website: (https://tdevizia.wixsite.com/website/music). The first four tracks are the Reinecke Sonata Undine, which I extensively analyze in chapter 4 of my book. This performance occurred on 3 April 1993 in the University of the Arts’ Laurie Wagman Hall as part of my first year graduate recital. Meng-Chieh Liu is the pianist, and he provides a flawless performance. For me, playing a live concert with him was absolute bliss, and with this particular piece, I felt like I was in the presence of God. It was glorious. The remaining three tracks are the Friedrich Kuhlau Gran Trio, op. 119 for Two Flutes and Piano. This performance occurred on 13 April 1996 as part of an alumni concert I did at the University of the Arts. My mentor from the Philadelphia Orchestra, David Cramer, joins me as the second flute, while Susan Nowicki plays the piano accompaniment. It was yet another moment of musical bliss because I was performing with the teacher who revolutionized my concept of sound and musicianship. I wanted to play as elegantly as I could to match his astounding level of musical artistry. In agreeing to perform with me, he elevated my skill level for fifteen minutes. My heart overflows with gratitude for those timeless moments, which I credit as the greatest performance of my career. The program notes for this piece are as follows:
A world of flutists have referred to Danish composer Friedrich Daniel Kuhlau as the “Beethoven of the Flute,” a title he earned for his extraordinary efforts to raise the standards of the flute music of his time. Kuhlau was born to a poor family on 11 September 1786 at Uelzen in Hanover who provided him with pianoforte lessons early in his youth. At the age of seven, he tragically lost his sight in one eye but did not allow this physical challenge to arrest his musical development. Upon completing his schooling at age fourteen, he ventured to Hamburg to study composition with C.F.G. Schwenke, and from approximately 1804, he gave regular piano recitals. Following Napoleon’s Hamburg invasion in 1810, Kuhlau fled to Copenhagen where he made a living as a pianist and composer. In 1825, he journeyed to Vienna, befriended Beethoven, and became intimate with Beethoven’s music.
Kuhlau’s reputation as a composer rests on his piano music, however, he had a knack for writing for the flute. His many compositions for the instrument can be attributed to the great demand for flute music and his need for supplemental income. Kuhlau’s flute compositions are so exquisitely written for the instrument that many prominent flutists believe that he himself had to have been a flutist. Although he never played the instrument, his flute compositions are among his finest instrumental works. French flutist Adolphe Hennebains once advised his student, Marcel Moyse, “If you do not learn Kuhlau deeply, you will never be able to play Mozart and Beethoven the right way…a flutist without knowledge of Kuhlau is not a complete flutist.” Fortunately flutists can enjoy an abundance of quintets, trios, duets, and accompanied and unaccompanied solos.
As a composer, Kuhlau was one of the foremost representatives of the late Classical and early Romantic periods in Denmark. Tragically, in 1830, a fire destroyed his home and all of his unpublished manuscripts, and shortly thereafter, his beloved parents died. Following this trauma, Kuhlau broke down completely, and his health deteriorated. He died 12 March 1832.
The “Gran Trio” op., 119 for Two Flutes and Piano was published in London in 1831. Like Kuhlau’s duets, both flute parts are of equal difficulty and importance, and the piano plays a significant role in the overall effect of the piece. Unlike his duets, which tend to be a prolonged test of physical endurance, the “Gran Trio” provides both flutists with ample opportunity to breathe and swallow.
The remaining pieces I wished to include on the CD have been or are in the process of being added to my YouTube channel (https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCVYDy-mE-Zr8d6yXP3JlHGw?view_as=subscriber). I have posted five Mozart opera arias that I originally intended to play as flute duets, but I combined the two parts into one and recorded them myself. The first aria is from The Magic Flute and is entitled Der Vogelfänger bin ich ja (Now tell me, did you ever see?). https://youtu.be/Jno6tYCRiUw This is the “bird catcher” aria. Papageno sings about how highly skilled he is at catching birds – the freest animals in the kingdom. Despite their capability to fly away, he can catch them in his net. What he really desires, however, is a net to catch girls. He would “catch them by the dozen, lock them up, and they would be mine.“ The girls prove more elusive because they have free will and the ability to think logically. He sings about how he has his heart set on a girl who would “kiss him tenderly,” so that he could marry her. She would “fall asleep at his side,” and he would “rock her to sleep like a child.” He desires closeness to a woman rather than the closeness he shares with birds.
The second aria is Ein Mädchen oder Weibchen (‘Tis Love They Say) (https://youtu.be/gP0LEbd2A9g) and is also sung by Papageno in The Magic Flute. The theme is very similar to the previous aria. He states his desire to find a suitable wife. He refers to her as a “dove” and claims that being united with his “dove” would be absolute “bliss.” It is not surprising that a bird catcher would compare a woman to a bird. The dove is a symbol of peace and purity – qualities he longs for in a relationship. Without the love he desires, he will “worry himself to death.” The one thing that can restore him to perfect health is a “woman’s kiss.”
Thirdly, La ci darem la mano (You’ll lay your hand in mine dear.) (https://youtu.be/qY15KYWQgoo) is from the opera Don Giovanni. In this scene, Don Giovanni is trying to seduce Zerlina who is engaged to Masetto. He wants her to run off with him. She is tempted but feels she can’t trust Don Giovanni. He is convincing and promises her “they will be hand in hand,” and he expects her to say, “I do.” She does not, however, feel his love is “pure.”
The fourth aria is Voi che sapete (Tell me fair ladies) (https://youtu.be/04PHaN86Dn0) and is a song from The Marriage of Figaro. Cherubino is the featured singer, and he is about to leave his friends to serve in the army. He seems to love many different women but claims he doesn’t really know what love feels like. He seeks the advice of other women to determine if his feelings are real. He feels “desire” and “both pleasure and suffering.” He can’t seem to “find peace at night or day,” and thus inquires as to whether he is really in love.
The final aria is Non piu andrai (Say goodbye now to pastime) (https://youtu.be/GVwpPY81feI) from The Marriage of Figaro. In this scene, Cherubino is being sent off to the military, and Figaro taunts him about how he must relinquish the carefree lifestyle he enjoys. He refers to him as a “lustful butterfly flitting to and fro,” a man who does nothing but “disturb the sleep of ladies.” He labels Cherubino a “Narcissus” and “Adonis,” a man who is in love with himself, and is only interested in beauty and desire. His good looks, which increase his popularity with the ladies, will be exchanged for the “hard face” of a soldier in battle.
There are two pieces that are in the process of being recorded and uploaded to YouTube: Bach/Gounod’s Ave Maria and the Ernest Bloch Suite Modale. I thoroughly analyze both in chapter 5 of my book. I have posted a video of Prelude No. 1 from The Well-Tempered Clavier (https://youtu.be/szaIWZr0vbk), which uses the harpsichord stop of my piano. My Yamaha electronic keyboard is capable of recording the tracks I play, so I am able to play both the flute and keyboard parts myself for select pieces. I still need to record both parts of the Bach/Gounod Ave Maria in the key of C major. Gounod believed that “God speaks in C major,” but I have managed to post a video of the Ave Maria in F major for solo flute (https://youtu.be/BWXmymdlqWg). I have always loved playing this in F because it is more brilliant in a higher key, and it is also one of my favorite pieces from Marcel Moyse’s book Tone Development Through Interpretation, which I studied intensely as a student of David Cramer. All of this music has special meaning for me because of the memories associated with it. As I play, I feel the magic of my past in my super-sized moment of now, almost as if time has stood still. I am convinced that time is not linear but spiral, and past, present and future overlap.
Tomorrow is Independence Day, and my husband and I are visiting my family. As we enjoy our cookout feast and watch the fireworks, my mind will transport me to every July fourth we have enjoyed in the past. The more things change, the more they stay the same. One noticeable difference will be the addition of our 17-month old nephew – my Godson, A.J. He recently learned to walk and is super-proud of himself. He is getting really good at outfoxing his parents with his antics, which is pure joy to observe. I love him as if he was my own son, and when we spend our time with him, I feel like his presence in our lives was God’s plan all along – even though we had to wait years for him to appear. His type of magic is worth the wait for this late bloomer who became an aunt at 48. Time has served me well. As the fireworks spiral across the sky, we will be witnessing another mirror example of the nature of time. Happy 4th , and may God speak to you in the now!!!
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